Thursday, June 28, 2012

Patience, people....

For those of you who don't know my educational background, I graduated from St.Cloud State with a degree in Community Psychology....For those of you going, "huh"??? Let me explain. My classes were kind of a mix between social work classes, psychology of the brain, child development classes, ethics, stats, etc etc... I actually love school. I love learning in general (lame, right?) and wouldn't be surprised if I end up going back some day to get my Masters.... In addition to my classes, my major required me to take a lot of behavior modification classes. In a nutshell, how to change the behavior of someone. Pretty useful information, especially when you have children, and work with children, right?? Most of it actually seems like common knowledge sometimes, but we don't always do it. Let me rephrase that... I don't always do it.
Ryder is 5 years old. 90% of the time, he is SO easy going and lovable. Since he is 5 and is capable of dressing, bathing, eating, playing, by himself (or mostly by himself) sometimes I feel like I treat him older than he is...Or at least, I forget that he is still straddling the line of dependence and independence as a kid. As his parent when I am laying in bed with him saying his prayers at night, I ALWAYS pray for my kids (both of them) to learn to be "kind, respectful, hard working, happy, and  honest". Pretty much in those exact words. If there are a few things I really want them to "get" in life, those are a few of the most important, in my opinion.
So why am I blogging about this? Why am I sharing my shortcomings as a parent with you? Let's go back to what I was saying earlier, about Ryder straddling the line of independence and dependence (and will likely continue to be for many many years to come!) I have noticed this shift in Ryder (maybe in part because of his age, or possibly with the birth of a new baby sister) where sometimes he just wants to be "big" and "growed up" (his own words). Other times, I will tell him not to do something, and if he doesn't like to tone of my voice, or the fact that I had to correct him on something, he will absolutely burst into tears much like a 2 or a 3 year old would do. This is not actually typical Ryder behavior, and so it frustrates me. After all, he is growing up, growing older, becoming more independent, why start these "babyish acts" now?? Then, in return I get more upset/angry with Ryder, which then upsets  him more (because like a good little boy, he doesn't like to disappoint his parents) and the cycle goes on and on! So, behavior modification....Common sense sometimes, but difficult to practice in real life all the time. I know (when I'm thinking rationally) that if I want Ryder's behavior to change, I need to first figure out what it is that he's getting out of his behavior. In most cases, it's probably my attention. Now, if I was a perfect parent, (which I SO am not) I would be SO good at providing Ryder with positive reinforcement regularly throughout the day that this would probably not even be an issue. Clearly, that's not happening. Or at least, it's not happening enough. The "smart" mommy in me says that instead of trying to correct all of his outbursts with punishment AFTER the fact, I need to consciously be rewarding him for positive things that I notice throughout the day. The hope is that a great deal of his negative behavior would decrease, and he would continue the positive behavior more frequently since his main goal is positive attention from mommy... Am I confusing you? If so, no worries, I confuse myself all the time. Let me just say---it makes sense in my head :) Now, I may have just spent the last 20 minutes of Piper's naptime blogging about how I have the answer to my own problem, but I promise you that it doesn't mean my problem is solved. It just simply means that as I reflect, I realize that I do know better than this (something I say to Ryder all the time, interestingly enough) and I CAN do better, as a mom. At least, I'm willing to try.... If I want to teach Ryder (and Piper) to be kind, respectful, hard working, honest, and happy, I should probably lead them by example, right? Woah. Mind boggling stuff here for a Thursday morning, I know.... Like I said, common sense, but sometimes the things that seem easiest in theory can be the hardest to put into action.
Therefor, I decided to try something new with Ryder starting this week. I am in the process of making him a little 'punch card' and whenever he does a good deed without being told to, or if I just notice something really positive that he's doing (random act of kindness?), he will be getting a sticker on his card. When he fills it up, he will get different rewards (a special "date" with mom and dad, going to a movie, etc). He's super excited about it and so am I. Although there are many things that Ryder currently needs to work on, so do I... Patience being one of those things. So, as always in this house, we'll give it a try and maybe it will work great, and maybe it won't, but either way, it's worth giving it a shot.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Mary Mary, Quite Contrary....

How does your garden grow?!
Well friends, for possibly the FIRST time ever, I can actually give you an answer to that silly riddle. It is (for once) growing great! This is the first year that I decided I was really going to get into this whole gardening thing. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my flowers and playing around with my landscaping, but I usually leave the vegetable gardening to Max, because it's big and intimidating. This year, however, we double teamed it and after many long hard and HOT hours in the sun this past weekend - there is not a weed in it! (Okay, maybe a few, but who's counting??) Obviously, I had to take a picture of it because goodness knows it probably won't last too long looking this way, but a girl can dream, right?!

And this, is what happens when a stay-at-home mommy gets quite bored and is feeling somewhat crafty during the day:
Because of all the work on the deck, Mr. Andy Gilbertson had lots of these little stakes laying around and he so graciously let me keep them instead of throwing them away so that I could paint them up and make some markers--because this lady gets a little confused every once in a while when trying to remember what I put where! 
So in case you were wondering what my Saturday consisted of this past weekend, there you have it. Ryder had a visit with his Grandma Nancy and little P hung out in her pack and play next to the garden while I pulled weed after weed and Max worked the tiller. In all honesty, it was so relaxing to be out there working the soil, getting sweaty, and chatting it up with the hubby enjoying our little homestead :) 
Then of course, we had to celebrate our hard work on Sunday with a breakfast brunch on the pontoon (we skipped out on church---sorry PJ and Kels!) It was the perfect morning and we didn't waste a second of it being inside. We were literally at the cabin from 10am to about 8pm and it was so relaxing! Piper even put her little swimsuit on and took her first dip in the lake--and she actually somewhat enjoyed it!




Wednesday, June 20, 2012

YIKES!

Has it really been over a month since I blogged last?! More like a month and half....Really??
I'd like to say that I simply forgot to do it, but I didn't....Not at all, actually. The truth is that the last time I blogged was May 6th- and May is simply a bad month for me. Wrapping up the school year is absolutely no fun for me at all, and the stress of it really hit me hard this year. I've had millions of emotions/bad days/ and topics that I could easily have vented to all my wonderful blog followers on PLENTY of occasions.....However, I chose not to. (You are welcome :)) I've been struggling. I don't know how else to say it, but I really just had a bad couple of months in terms of my attitude towards most things....Not all of it has been related to work, but mostly in general I just have had the feeling that my 'to-do' list just continues to grow and grow and nothing ever gets accomplished the way I want it to. Instead of coming on here, logging on, and rehashing all the stuff that has been bringing me down, knowing it would only more than likely bring anyone reading this down also, I chose to simply take a break from the blogging world. The good news is that it's now summer break and I can take a few steps back and just relax and love on my babies...And blog, of course :)
June has been SO unbelievably busy. We have literally had something going on every single weekend, which is fun--yet exhausting at the same time. Piper started crawling in early May--and since then NONE of us have stopped moving, in an attempt to keep up with that girl. She is trouble!  busy, but we love her.... Ryder started t-ball, so he's a pretty happy guy and is looking forward t kindergarten in the fall. I'm still coming to terms with this! MJ just finished his very first 1/2 Marathon, so I am ONE. PROUD. WIFEY :) Max and some friends ran the Grandma's 1/2 Marathon in Duluth last weekend and he finished the race with a time of 1hr and 48 minutes. I am so pumped for him (and Kyle, Joe, and Leah), and only a little bit sad that I didn't hop on the bandwagon too so that I could have ran w/ him.... Or let's be honest, behind him... Maybe next time?? As for me, I'm adjusting to my new role (for the time being) as just mommy. Or, mommy/house keeper/landscaper/chauffer/doctor/babysitter/maid/playmate/chef/wife/magician/etc ---whatever you prefer to call it ;) Oh- and in case you were wondering- I'm still on track with the 'one a month' running goal and finished the "Lola's Lakehouse 5K" in Waconia with Max, Joe, and Kyle on June 9th. Coming up in July is of course, the Watercade 4-Mile Run/Walk and the following weekend is the Color Run in the cities which I am SUPER excited for. I haven't stopped running my mouth about it since one of my besties texted me about it (thanks, sam!) and so literally, I don't even know who all is doing it anymore. I just know alot of us are, and it's going to be a good time... I don't have one for August yet (so I'm thinking I will just invent one in honor of the legendary twine ball and it's designated day--I heard the mayor thinks he's Usain Bolt (my husband told me to say this) so maybe he can pull some strings?? ) , but September is up in the air.... Kristin and I are considering (if she gets her but up here from Key West!!) the Women Rock 10K/ 1/2 Marathon .... We shall see :)   

Sunday, May 6, 2012

One a Month!

Tonight I was feeling extra lazy....I ran some unsuccessful errands in Hutch, it was not very pleasant outside all day, and I really just felt blah. However, at 7:15pm, I laced up my good old' Brooks running shoes, and headed out the door with Ryder close behind me. He hopped on his bike and I set out for a run. I didn't want to, but I did it anyway.
And I'm so glad I did :) Runner's high is the best feeling in the world. Hands down. If I'm in a bad mood, I know the cure is to lace up and go running. Sometimes when I run I process my day at work, work through my frustrations, make mental lists in my head, or more often than not, put on some damn good workout music on pandora, put the headphones in my ears and just jam out to pass the time.
This weekend is the "Empower Race for the Future" around Lake Ripley. Proudly, I can say that since I started running again after Piper was born, I have ran either a 5K or a 7K every month! In February I ran the Frozen 5K in Spicer with my sister-in-law, Amy. March was the St.Patty's Day "Get Lucky 7K" with friends and family in the cities. April was an early Earth Day 5K in Key West with Kristin, and of course this weekend is the Empower race in Litchfield. I was hoping to do the Fitgers 5K in Duluth when Max runs his half marathon, but sadly it is already full, so looks like I will need to find a new race in June!
So my goal? One a month until..... well, who knows when!? Minnesota winters are tricky - but I'm shooting for November ---wish me luck! :)

Saturday, May 5, 2012

1/2

Okay, so this post is about a month late... Today is actually miss Piper's 7 month old birthday, meaning exactly a month ago, my little one turned half a year old.
How does that even happen?? It doesn't feel like it was that long ago when I was crying to my husband in bed after yet another month went by leaving us not pregnant. We had wanted a baby so badly, and there were times we just didn't understand why it wasn't happening, and we had even began to fear that it wouldn't happen at all. To this day, I have no idea why it did take us a full year to get pregnant, but I do know that for this sweet little girl, it was worth the wait :)
Clearly, God had a plan for us and on October 5, 2011 we welcomed P into our little family. She has brought us so much joy, that I can't even imagine our lives without her! Here is what I know about Piper Grace thus far:
*She looks like her mommy! :) This is so fun for me, because Ryder is a spitting image of his dad. Literally, spitting image. The only thing on that child that I claim as my own would be the adorable little freckles that are scattered across his upper cheeks/nose... So, at random moments when I am picking Piper up out of the crib, or if we are just playing on the floor and she does something that reminds me of me, it is a pretty incredible feeling...I love her dark hair and her sweet blue eyes.
*Although she looks like her mom, she has her dad's pouty lips and likes to show them off when she is upset. It is adorable...
*She has a mind of her own and is very strong willed. She wants what she wants, and you will not be able to persuade her otherwise. For instance, from very early on we have tried just about every pacifier on the market, because they make lives easier on parents, right? Well, P has her own thoughts about pacifiers/nuks/whatever you want to call them, and she has refused them time and time again.We no longer try. In the battle of the nukie, Piper=1, Mom and dad= 0 :(
*She loves to chit-chat.... She is quite the babbler, and likes to hear her own voice. Currently she spends the majority of her day saying "ba-ba-ba-ba!!!" with enthusiasm, and within the last week or so she has really been working on her "p" sounds. She also likes to make 'mmmm' noises when she is upset or frustrated, and she likes to imitate whatever you are doing/saying with her lips. She is quite observant...
*When she sleeps, she likes to roll on to her side and grab her blankies up to her cheek. It melts my heart.
*I can't really think of any 'favorite' toys, but she does usually play in her exersaucer quite well, and she loves to be outside. She also loves her outdoors swing and she likes to watch mommy groom the horse.
*At 6 months old, Piper got her very first little tooth :) I believe she is currently working on some more, and of course, EVERYTHING goes in her mouth!
*Call me crazy, but I believe that she loves shopping. Just loves it. Let me explain by saying that Piper is not always known for being the most content child, sometimes she can be a little needy/demanding... However, when we have to make a target or  a shopping mall run, the girl is just an angel. Seriously. I'm pretty sure it means she loves to shop.
*She likes her naps.... She takes 3 naps everyday, 2 shorter ones in the morning, and a longer one (about 2 hours) in the afternoons... Sometimes she even likes a cat-nap in the evening if she's had a busy day!
*She sits up so well by herself and can get herself in complete crawling position. It is only a matter of days before she takes that first little crawl--and then, I have a feeling I will be one busy mommy!
*She absolutely lights up when she sees someone she knows and loves... She has a beautiful smile, the kind that goes all the way up to her eyes. She loves to giggle, and she loves her big brother... He does such an amazing job of entertaining her and playing with her.
*She absolutely can not stand when her daddy kisses/blows on her cheek. (Apparently, she does not dig facial hair on men, --and she get so angry with him when he does it, and then just laughs at her!) She does, however, love daddy's red Titleist hat, and riding on the lawn mower with him :)
*She likes to be around people, and does not repond well to being left alone for very long at all! She likes to be front and center, smack dab in the middle of the action. She's quite the busy little bee...

*....And most importantly, she is quite possibly the most loved little girl on the face of this planet. Of course, I may be a little biased ;) Can't wait to see what the second half of her first year will bring us!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

what life was like at mile marker 0!

Finally, a little alone time to sit down and gush about my Key West trip! I know it has been long awaited.... Forgive me for the delay, but adjusting back in the saddle of mommylife has taken it's toll on me! :)

I woke up early on Thursday morning with a slight hint of excitement, and a HUGE anxiety about leaving my kids and the hubby. It was an emotional morning, but by the time we were nearing the airport and the kids had been dropped off, I was ready for my vacation! My morning at the airport started off as every morning should, in my opinion, -with a delicious dark chocolate mocha from caribou coffee. My coffee was delicious, the people watching was phenomenal, life was good. However, that was the beginning of what later would be known as one of the longest days of my life. Let me just say it. I hate airlines, and the crabby agents that work at them, at least the ones I had to deal with! Anyway... Long story short, because of millions of delays, I ended up shackin' up in Miami for the night. Not really a huge deal since my flight to Key West was taking off at 8am the next morning anyway, but still-- I was over it.

So the next morning after approximately 3 hours of sleep for the night, I finally made my appearance in Key West and was rejoined once again with my bestie, Kristin :) Due to my extreme exhaustion, the first stop we made was this cute little coffee shop. This is where I learned my first piece of valuable key west information: they love their chickens! Kristin and I were peacefully sipping on our iced coffees catching up on any and everything when all of a sudden this little chicken decided to walk on through the coffee shop and join us on the patio. Um, excuse me? I'm at a coffee shop and there is a chicken parked next to me on the ground. Then I looked down the street and realized that chickens are probably like the state mascot, because they kind of roam around wherever they want....love it. The rest of my day involved a shower, some shopping, a spin/pedal & pump class (I was convinced that I was either going to die, fall off, or lose my virginity (again) while on that damn bike, but no worries, friends-- I made it alive (and in tact!) ! :)) That night we ate a fancy little italian restuarant in order to 'carb up' for our 5k the followin morning. The food was fabulous (although my plate could have easily fed the entire population of Darwin) but we were all exhausted so we decided to call it an early night... After a little skype action with Max and Piper :) (Ryder was at his grandmas)

Saturday was race day, so up an at'em we were! I'm so proud of my best friend for beginning this running/getting healthy journey, and more than anything, for having a goal, and accomplishing it! So happy to have been able to be a part of that accomplishment with her! We ran along the beach, which is about enough motivation for me- It was absolutely beautiful and believe it or not, the weather was perfect. Not chilly at all, but not too hot either. Just great! After our run we lounged around for a while, made some lunch, skyped with the fam back home (who I missed dearly!!) and then decided we wanted to go Kayaking. We packed a few beers in a cooler, put our suits on, and away we went! Kristin and I took a double kayak and we thought we were pretty cool, although we just couldn't keep up with Eric. Apparently we aren't the speediest kayaker's but we made our own way! We saw starfish and jellyfish, mangroves (whatever the hell they are??) and multi-million dollar homes along the channel that we were in. Amazing. :) After this little excersion, was naptime.... Ahhhhh the joys of being on vacation and being able to take a nap. Uninterrupted. Alone. No Kids....  After we woke up we decided to shower up and get pretty for the night. We went to Santiagos Bodega for dinner, soooo yummy. The food was great, but the Sangrias were even better! ;) Following multiple glasses of the sangria was a wise (??) decision to hit up Duval Street "for a couple".

My oh my. There were people EVERYWHERE, and at least like 50 bars just hopping with people. It was here that I discovered another little key west secret: strawberry beer :) -YUM! After a nice classy bar serving the strawberry beer, we made our way up to another bar. A slightly different bar. A clothing optional bar. I actually saw the sign that said "Clothing option beyond this point" and kind of thought it was cute, just for decoration. WRONG. I walked in and my poor little innocent eyes were not prepared for what they were about to take in. The term, "partying naked" in Key West, is actually meant quite literally! Now, if you know me, then you would know that I was like "trying-not-to-pee-in-my-pants-laughing-so-hard" mode as we people watched in this bar. To be fair, most people in the bar were dressed. And most of them seemed quite normal, many of them were young like us, in fact. However, the people hangin' out with their goods out for the world to see were all probably over the age of at least 50 and this just added to my amusement.  I'm actually laughing out loud as I type this.... The next bar we went to was much more normal--although I did end up stealing a pink tiara off of some guy's head and wearing it around the rest of the night, and although I'm pretty sure that sort of thing doesn't happen in Darwin, you never know...

Sunday morning brought with it only a slight hangover (thank goodness!) and to remedy this, Kristin and I decided to bike down and get some breakfast... After enjoying that, we hit up the beach for the day. I'm talking teal-crystal clear blue water kind of beach. It was soooo pretty! I probably could have laid there all damn day... On our little bike cruise on the way home we picked up groceries and made homemade fish tacos for dinner. Then we went out to the Sunset Festival where I discovered love for a man who's job is to hide behind some palm tree branches and jump out and scare people. If you have gotten so busy with your life that you forgot how funny it is to see people get absolutely terrified/pranked, you are missing out. I highly recommend it. (And yes, I donated to his tip jar!) Some sinful ice cream followed the sunset festival and a little more shopping.

Monday morning was an early one, because I was determined to wake up for a sunrise run to the beach. Well worth it! Then we hit the streets with some serious shopping to do, and before I knew it, it was time to say our goodbyes! Although I was sad to be leaving, I was so anxious to get home to my babies!!! (All three of them). I said goodbye to my bestie and boarded the plane (after ANOTHER 2 hr delay) to Tampa Bay... It was here that my husband proved to be my night and shining armor (again) and got the airlines to switch me from having 2 stops left in my journey, to having a non-stop flight from tampa to minneapolis..... Do you love him or what? I do :) Around 8:30 pm that night I arrived safe and sound (thank God!) back in good ol' Minny and take my word for it,  I have never been so damn excited to see that damn ball of twine before in my life because it meant my kids were just a minute away! .... Only in darwin, friends! :)

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

what have we been doing?

If you are wondering this question, it means that I have once again been slacking on this poor little blog. Oh well, I've had better things to do, and lucky for you-- now you get to hear about all those 'better things!' :)
Spring break was a few weeks ago. We had a great time just hanging out with family and friends. We did take a little adventure to Airmaxx Trampoline Park in St.Cloud with Ryder's cousins and they had a blast, while this momma was sweating bullets. It is a workout! Other than that, we just enjoyed being home, and being together - and really, what is better than that? 
Then of course came Easter and all those little Easter festivities. We died 'koolaid' easter eggs, went on easter egg hunts, and that silly bunny made it's way out to darwin and left some goodies for Piper and Ryder. We praised 'the big guy' at church, hung out with our families, and as always, ate. (And then ate some more.)
Somewhere right around this time, my little peeps celebrated her 1/2 year of life.... 6 months old already?? I'm still trying to figure out just where all that time went, but I'll save that for another post - turning ".5" gets you your own blog post around here ;) 
Next came Key West. And yes, there will be a separate post for this also. Way too much excitement to combine it all into this one.... more to come!
Along with all of these celebrations is a bit of sadness as well. This household has been 'Fighting for Gage" and sending our prayers up for him and his family since day one. If you don't know about Gage, you probably aren't from around these parts. Gage is a young boy who was diagnosed back in October with an inoperable brain tumor, and his fight ended this past Sunday. Although I know he was so young and had so much life yet to live, I know in my heart that Jesus is taking care of him now, and I know he is free of all the pain. I don't know all the details of heaven and earth, but my faith is strong, and I know for a fact that Jesus loves his children!  I haven't been able to formulate words on how all of this has made me feel up until now because as a parent, I just can't wrap my head around what the Drivers and all of their family and friends have been going through. Even if you have no idea who these people are....please say a prayer for them to find comfort and peace, a prayer for Gage up in heaven, and if you can, donate to the Pediatric Brain Tumor Foundation :) I realize that money doesn't solve problems such as heartache and grieving, but it can fund research to find cures for all these malicious diseases. We have some really smart and talented people in this world, and with the right tools and resources, they will figure this stuff out eventually, I'm sure of it! 

And on that note, this mommy is heading to bed. Yes, it is 9:30 --don't judge :)